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Will Pimp For Pizza

April 1, 2007

Just when I thought I have heard it all I learn today that a woman offered a man, the pleasures of her teenage daughter’s body in exchange for a pizza. And to all the femhags out there who believe all men are raplsts, the man turned down the offer. Nothing new here you say? Food for nookie happens all the time? This really got me thinking. This is a serious issue here in America. A serious issue indeed that I thankfully have a solution for. Allow me to digress for a moment: Take this common scenario: A man takes a woman out for dinner, and perhaps a movie. In our culture, the man almost always pays for the meal and the movie. Why does he? It’s obvious he is hoping to do the “beast with two backs” at the end of the night. Here’s the quandary that women face. If the woman opens the “portal to her body” (after a man bought her dinner), then she was in essence, basically paid like a “pro of the flesh” for the act of nookie – in... See More Tour Details »

Women Want Men To Sit When Peeing!

March 22, 2007

German men are being shamed into urinating while sitting down by a gadget which is saving millions of women from cleaning up in the bathroom after them. About 1.8 million toilets are already haunted by Spuk, or Spook, as the little $10 device is called. Attached to the underside of the toilet seat, Spuk quietly endures sitting visitors. But anyone trying to lift the seat and attempt to stand and urinate (known as “Stehpinkeln“) should be prepared for the ghost’s unrelenting wrath. “Hey, stand-peeing is not allowed here and will be punished with fines, so if you don’t want any trouble, you’d best sit down,” one of the devices orders in a voice impersonating the German leader, Chancellor Gerhard Schroder. Another has a voice similar to that of his predecessor, Helmut Kohl. “Excuse me, but there’s a penalty for peeing while standing in this house,” it warns culprits. “You’d better not risk any problems and sit down!” Other... See More Tour Details »

Boycott Valentine’s Day!

February 5, 2007

Valentine’s Day is the perfect day to leave your miserable wife or gold-digging girlfriend. Take your uncompatible nightmare out for dinner and ask her for a divorce (and to also pickup the dinner check too!). While all the doormats are handing over diamonds at the tables next to you, you can feel proud that you are on your way to a long fulfilling life of no stress and immense personal wealth. My brothers over at the Don’t Get Married Forum are buzzing as expected this fine Valentine’s Day. Brother systems1082 gives some keen insight to those who may be happy with their wives or girlfriends and are thinking of buying their sweeties a Valentine’s Day gift. “Valentines day is approaching and I wonder how many men are anticipating a rolex or a platinum bracelet from his wife or girlfriend. I counted over 53 different tv, radio and newspaper ads during Christmas and closer to 75 during Valentines Day. The ties, the flower or cards are nice but do they compare... See More Tour Details »

His House, Her Home Filled With Garbage

January 25, 2007

Countless women have divorced a man for drinking too much and becoming abusive. And rightly so. No one likes a nasty lush. And especially if the lush refuses rehab and any help. Some have divorced over smaller issues, like snoring too loud or excessive flatulence. And honestly who knows if that is the real reason and not simply a trigger to some underlying event. We don’t know. However, in this case, Ed’s wife suffers from OCD and has filled their house of love with garbage. He hung in there for many years and has had enough. What caught my eye, are the women out there who post about him “humiliating” his wife by filming his house and posting it on the internet for the world to see. These women feel he is not doing enough and should be there forever through her illness, blah blah blah. I can’t wait to read all the email that will come in on this story, “How would you like it if you get cancer or some other serious illness and your wife dumps you?... See More Tour Details »

Gene Simmons on Double Standards And Hypocrisy

January 18, 2007

Gene Simmons of the rock band KISS, asks that men fully think about marriage instead of leaping into the dark. What one person does is up to them but he urges people to really understand the financial ramifications of what they are getting into. “Let’s face it, just because I stick out my tongue a lot and spit fire doesn’t mean I have any qualifications to advise anyone on relationship, money or career issues. I don’t. Yet I’ve lived with a beautiful woman for twenty years with never a cross word between us, in a relationship based on honesty and full disclosure. I’ve amassed a fortune-and `expert business people’ work for me. And for three decades I’ve been in KISS- a band that has scaled the heights and broken every possible record, from album sales to touring to merchandising and licensing.” [Gene Simmons Front Cover] This is good advice from a good book. The Staff here at dumpyourwifenow.com are tickled pink to be reading it. We... See More Tour Details »

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